Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
