before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Randomize