I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
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