I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Randomize