i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
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