As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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