Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
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