also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
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