He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
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