Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Randomize
