Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
