If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Randomize
