he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
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