What a fucking waste of an outfit
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
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We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
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I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
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