idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
