Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
Randomize