please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
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