it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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