He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Randomize