I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Enjoy the penises
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
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