Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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