I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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