It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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