sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Randomize