Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Randomize
