I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
And then my night got REAL pukey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
My bed smells like the plague
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Randomize