So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
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