Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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