If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
So vagazzling was a success
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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