i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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