yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
