On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
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