so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
