i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
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