"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Randomize
