Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize
