I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
operation have a gay friend backfired
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
