do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
19 Confessions From A Dude With A Micropenis
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
17 Exes Admit Why They Were Crazy In Their Past Relationship
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.