this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
