Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
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we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
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I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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