Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
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