TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
