Texts From Last Night

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  (425): View more from Washington

  I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.

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  (425): I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class. http://tfl.nu/j3lm
  Replies (12) Good night (4407) Bad night (1145)
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  (763): View more from Minnesota

  Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.

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  (763): Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking. http://tfl.nu/53g7
  Replies (9) Good night (3356) Bad night (1018)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim

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  (702): Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim http://tfl.nu/n7dg
  Replies (11) Good night (3388) Bad night (818)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake

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  (503): We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake http://tfl.nu/m3xg
  Replies (13) Good night (3342) Bad night (795)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up

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  (410): I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up http://tfl.nu/ucpy
  Replies (7) Good night (2122) Bad night (1103)
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  (563): View more from Iowa

  I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?

  (208): View more from Idaho

  Beautiful, beautiful reality

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  (563): I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality? (208): Beautiful, beautiful reality http://tfl.nu/pfhr
  Replies (3) Good night (2057) Bad night (530)
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl

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  (918): He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl http://tfl.nu/2qwr
  Replies (3) Good night (1538) Bad night (595)
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  (801): View more from Utah

  New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.

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  (801): New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes. http://tfl.nu/3a1v
  Replies (5) Good night (1272) Bad night (424)
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  (772): View more from Florida

  How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?

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  (772): How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer? http://tfl.nu/kmhe
  Replies (7) Good night (1142) Bad night (493)
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  (323): View more from California

  Your cock deserves a montage

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  (323): Your cock deserves a montage http://tfl.nu/nty6
  Replies (1) Good night (1261) Bad night (519)
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party

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  (602): The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party http://tfl.nu/nvop
  Replies (2) Good night (970) Bad night (331)
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  (914): View more from New York

  He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.

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  (914): He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast. http://tfl.nu/061g
  Replies (4) Good night (694) Bad night (383)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll

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  (847): Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll http://tfl.nu/osu5
  Replies (0) Good night (238) Bad night (437)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home

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  (503): Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home http://tfl.nu/qybd
  Replies (5) Good night (458) Bad night (359)
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  (631): View more from New York

  Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good

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  (631): Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good http://tfl.nu/dysc
  Replies (1) Good night (739) Bad night (181)

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