Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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