party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Randomize
