Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
