Your face is a jimmy john
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I need a beard to bite.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Randomize
