think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
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