When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
10 Things Your Gyno Wants You To Stop Doing To Your Vagina
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
For Some Reason, Boys Are Singing The ‘Halo’ Theme Song In School Bathrooms
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.