ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Randomize
