It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
he fucked my hip out of place.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
wow bdsm is so cute
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