toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I just had sex on a roof
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
